Thursday, October 2, 2014

25 ways to get your child's attention

"Mom, which sticker do you want me to use for your picture?
Which sticker now, Momma?
Which sticker do you want me to put on your picture now?
Mom, choose another sticker for your picture?
Mommy, what color should I use to draw your name?
Mom, what color should I use to draw a cat?"

"Mom, do you want to see how this guy can jump on a roof?
Mom, come look at my green motorcycle?
Momma, this motorcycle is going to blow up, come see. It's turning red.
Mom, do you know how I change people?
Mom, did you know this is my favorite game?"

The questions and statements kept coming and coming.  My name was attached at the beginning or end of every question or statement.  EVEN THOUGH I just spent an hour doing homework, playing a game and giving my kids my undivided attention when they didn't want to answer any questions I asked them or tell me what picture they were drawing. Homework time was actually a hot mess. There was crying and screaming and begging to be set free from the misery.

So how did I all of a sudden get both of my kids to want my attention at the exact same time?

It's pretty hard to do.
You ready for it…

I sat down to the computer to edit some pictures and blog them.

So, are you feeling lonely, Mama?  Are your little ones neglecting you and not giving you the time of day?  Never fear!  If you need your kids' attention, throw away the old ways of calling their name and try one of these:

25 Ways to Get Your Child's Attention 

1. Talk to an old friend on the phone.
2. Talk to anybody on the phone.
3. Go into the bathroom and sit on the toilet.
4. Actually you can even just take a step towards the direction of the bathroom. 
5. Sit down at the computer.
6. Pull out your phone to check Facebook.
7. Start texting someone.
8. Try to watch a funny Youtube video.
9. Try to watch anything.
10. Try to take a picture of them with your phone.
11. Check your email on your phone.
12. Touch your phone at all.  In any way.  They will come.
13. Try to exercise.
14. Open a book for yourself.
15. Start a craft.
16. Give attention to one of the other kids.
17. Lay your head softly on your pillow.
18. Even just think to yourself, maybe I can lie down for fifteen minutes.
19. Sit on the couch and look happy.
20. Sit in the kitchen and look happy.
21. Sit in your room and look happy.
22. Sit anywhere while looking happy. They will come.
23. Go in any room and shut the door.
24. Start making dinner.
25. Do anything you even kind of enjoy.


One thing that doctors fail to tell us when we bring our babies home from the hospital is that children are born with a built in "Mommy is happy" sensor.  And when that sensor starts going off. . . well they will do anything to be a part of it.  And by be a part of it, I mean destroy it.

But it will all even out in the long run.  Because I'm hoping that as soon as my kids reach the teenage years, we moms will become equipped with a "they're up to something" sensor.  So payback will be delightful.