Tuesday, July 8, 2014

12 ways to annoy your six year old boy (because sometimes revenge is sweet)

So six year old boys can be kind of annoying.  It's just the way it is, just the facts of life.  And of course, if it's your six year old, you love him to pieces.  You wouldn't trade him for anything in the world.  You would walk through fire for him.  He is your world and your everything.  But. . . that doesn't mean he's not annoying sometimes.

So isn't it about time to fight back?

12 Ways To Annoy Your Six Year Old Boy (because sometimes revenge is sweet)

1.  Have hair.  The longer your hair, the better it works.  "Mom, your hair is on me again!"  Whoops.

2.  Wash your clothes in the same load as his clothes. "Ewwww, there's a hairball in my shirt!"  Oh honey, I'm so sorry.  NOT.

2.  Take lots of pictures of him.  Take pictures when he's smiling, pictures when he's mad, and pictures when he's annoyed that you're taking pictures.  "Don't you have like hundreds of pictures of me already, Mom?"  Oh sweet boy.  Try thousands.

3.  Lovingly stroke his face when he's trying to tell you a story.  He might brush your hand away a few times, but that just means he really loves it.  So keep doing it.

4.  Ask him if he remembered to flush the toilet EVERY time he comes out of the bathroom.  Even if you hear it.  And even if you know he just went in there to brush his teeth.  "Mom, I just went in there to brush my teeth like you told me!"  Oh my bad, I forgot.  

5.  When he leaves the table and forgets to clear his plate, call him back to do it. And then make him give you a high five.  Making him clear his plate just teaches good manners.  The high five is an added annoying bonus factor.

6.  Stand outside the shower and repeatedly ask him if he needs your help.  "I still don't need your help, Mom."

7.  Make him watch Dora the Explorer with his sister.  And ask him if he loves Boots as much as you do.

8.  Sit next to him when he's playing Minecraft, and repeatedly ask him logical questions.  Why did your wolf pet die?  Did you not feed him?  How did you tame him?  Where did he come from?  Why didn't you build him a fence?  With a leash?  And a collar?  "I just DON'T KNOW, Mom!"  Oh, sorry, I was just asking.

9.  Sing along to his favorite song really loud and off key.  "You're ruining it, Mom."  Hmmm, kind of like you ruined my morning when you woke up at 6:00 and came in wanting chocolate chips? (He still hasn't gotten it yet that chocolate chips are only for grown ups)

10. Make him do his chores.  This is another one that just teaches good manners.  And life skills.  You can make it extra fun by dancing around him and singing loudly, "We're doing cho-ores, we're doing cho-ores," and clapping.

11.  Ruffle his hair when you walk by.  This annoys children of all ages.  Feel free to try it on your toddler, as well.

12.  Hug him and kiss him any chance you get.  Actually this one is my favorite.  And I'm pretty lucky that it doesn't annoy my 6 year old too badly.  Yet.  As long as he's not trying to feed his wolf pet in Minecraft.

So there you go.  If your six year old boy is driving you insane today, try one of these. I promise it will make you feel better.